Just kidding. But it’s on!
First, she refused my request to call Barry Zito and say things that any man in a slump needs to hear. Secondly, she’s a Dodgers fan. Thirdly, she NEVER would have dated me when I was single.
She’s hot, she’s "Charmed" and she’s a *******’ Dodgers Fan… and this Giants fan is ready to take her on (or just get her attention so he can tell his friends, ‘Hey, Alyssa Milano talked to me AGAIN today’). Hence, we’re totally in a fight.
Now our teams are locked in battle in an NL West showdown down in the land of men who take 140 minutes to do their hair. With Luis Gonzalez dribbling into a 4-6-3 double play in the 8th, those same guys are leaving to go home and put some more wax in their faux hawks.
It’s too bad because Armando Benitez always manages to do his best to help anyone other than the Giants win. Tonight is no exception, either, thanks to two hits and closing the game by baaaaarrrrrely getting out Rafael Furcal in a footrace to first base.
But it’s 1-0 in favor of the Good Guys. (I love calling a team with Barry Bonds "Good Guys"! It drives everyone nuts!)
It’s 1-0, in favor of Keith. Loser buys the winner dinner at The Ivy. My wife is TOTALLY cool with that.
Your team just got paddled like you did by Marky Mark Whalberg in "Fear"! How does that feel? You like that!? Hit me with your best shot, Alyssa!